“Girls Can Get It” by Dr Hook and the Medicine Show

Girls can get it, anytime they like
Girls can get it, a fact of life
If she calls you for some loving in the middle of the night
She can get a man running at the speed of light

It’s true – a sufficiently sexually motivated man can indeed run at the speed of light. Unfortunately, that means he will be too damn exhausted for any sexy times afterwards. (And the neighbours are going to complain about all the sonic booms moving that fast generates.)